Friday, February 24, 2012

Explaining The Triptych

Surprise #1 was released yesterday to a whirlwind of download ruckus - in 24 hours, almost 500 of you sickos downloaded this new trio of tales. I was taken aback by this - I had no idea these three little stories would warrant such interest, so let me give you a smidge of backstory on this and hopefully clear up a few things that seem to be causing burps and bells:

The title "Triptych" refers to a 3-paneled painting of some religious iconography. Popular during the Renaissance, these types of paintings don't happen much anymore - but there is a reason these three seemingly-unrelated stories all fall under this one larger title...they're all religious in nature!

I became obsessed with different religions and the types of folk tales, anecdotes, etc. that they passed down through their history. I read a ridiculous amount of them. Then I whittled it down to three religions and really honed in. I came up with what you have here.


"Saint Gemma" is a cryptic retelling of the legend of the Catholic Saint Gemma. I liked her because - she was female and a saint...which isn't common. I also liked the legend surrounding her - mostly the part where she bled and vanished into thin air. There was something horrifying and alluring about that. I added in the character of Priyanka to give a voice to the Hindu religion - her personality is modelled after a goddess, so you are left with a Hindu goddess meeting a Catholic saint, and both of them exacting what made them famous in the first place. There is no sense to this story. It is meant to leave you confused and baffled because - that's what Saint Gemma did.
This was the shortest piece in the collection because originally I didn't even want this to be a story - just a glimpse, flash, dash, snort of a scene in a woman's daily life. No beginning, no middle or end - just BOO!/gone. This is panel 1 of the triptych.

"The Night Walkers" is African. I have tried and tried to find my source material and can't - but the gist of it was originally from Kenya (I think), and a story about a man who meets a ghost along a deserted path in the jungle. What caught my attention was the fact that the ghost's attitude the entire time was HELL YEAH I'M A GHOST! I liked that he was proud of being dead, and criticized the living man for not being more ghost-like in nature. There was an Aesop-quality tone to this little African ditty, so I used the arrogant ghost and relayed the center panel of the triptych. The setting for this is a lead-in to the final story and set in familiar terrain. This is the same stretch of highway where MANY others have been set ("The Binding," "The Two O'Clock," "Gardenia Blossoms," "The Day Cassandra Came," and so many others it's pointless to continue)...

"Up The Gump Stump" is originally a Buddhist parable that I just basically raped. There is very little of the original story left in here, but if you look super-carefully, you might find a twinkle in the dialogue between the chicken and the dog. At the core - this is a brains vs. braun story. This was originally much shorter - about the length of "The Night Walkers," but it kept nagging at me so I returned and it blossomed. In this version - it's a much richer, meatier, funnier story that has gone down as one of my all-time favorites. I read this now as if I didn't write it, and everytime that little persnickety chicken starts waddling or back-talking...it makes me laugh.
This was originally published in The Piker Press (2/13/2012) and got favorable reviews. It is included here as the third and final panel of the triptych.

Catholism. Islam. Buddhism.

That being said - grab your copy here!

$1 for 35 pages of joyous reading bliss - and help yourself to any of the other titles available!

Keep Reading!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Announcements!!!

The rumors are all true - there are two big, juicy snacks coming your way over the next two weeks. Did I say two? Yes, I said it.

In addition to "Mattropolis" (due March 1, 2012), I have also pulled an old friend out of obscurity and fixed it all up - ready for company. As a special surprise - there will also be another .99c short story coming before "Mattropolis" that you should all enjoy. This surprise release will contain three dainty short stories - only one of which has been published before.

On Twitter I get a lot of direct messages from readers asking if I have any plans for March in the "short-story" arena. It seems my rapid-fire style of popping out new adventures has found a niche audience that demands more - or at least more details while they wait.

Don't hold me to anything specific, date-wise - but on the distant 30-day horizon, I'm looking at the following projects:

1. Getting some more stories into magazines - I really love learning new places to find stories to read and new authors to love. If I can join in and be included - it's even better. There are three or four that I've penned recently that I would love to see in a magazine. A couple that are killing me not to be able to talk about - I'm sure I'll cave eventually...

2. Finish a co-authored project with my ghostwriting bestest friend - a short story with a working title of Rage. We are taking turns telling snippets of the story - but also trying to gross each other out. The pages we have accumulated so far are downright disgusting and I cannot wait to share it with all of you. Hopefully we can wrap that up, edit it and I'll have that on Amazon during March/April 2012.

3. Finish my short story set in a laundromat - based on a real event, this tale is dying to be finished and it's been lingering in my uncompleted folder for too many weeks.

So best case scenario: you can expect at least two new stories during the coming month. If I can't stand it - I might drag an old friend out of the closet again, dust it off and shine it up as a special surprise, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there!

Monday, February 13, 2012

Old Friends for Sale

It just dawned on me that I haven't done this:

Below are links to all my available short stories/novellas/perversions online. Typically I would never comment on a short story, but for this blog I don't see any reason not to...

Corduroy
This is an attempt at Flash Fiction. Since I can't tell nice, happy stories - I threw a guy in the trunk of a car and made it into a religious hate-crime in 900 words or less.

Old Rosa's (Home For Weary Travelers)
This one was originally written for a different magazine - I changed my mind when Dew on the Kudzu liked it! Originally titled ORHFWT, this was shortened for aesthetics and features my home town, a crushed velvet suit (of course), blood-thirsty rage and - a crazy old lady with a pet opossum named Cartier.

Up The Gump Stump
Now we're talkin' - this is a prime example of what I love to write. I originally included this in a highly abbreviated form in a larger short story no one will ever see entitled "Triptych" where I took 3 different cultures, read up on their typical folk tales and legends - then made my own. The three were all short, snippet stories - but UTGS always nagged at me. It wanted me to come back and fix it - bring it to life...so with the addition of nearly 4,500 more words - the delightful story of Merriweather McCluck and Mr. Dog came to life - in full force. This is one of my all-time favorites just because it's so quirky - and I like her snarky attitude.

***Coming Soons***

"Trestlewood Estates" - has been accepted and should be included in a print anthology this coming Summer/Fall. Once I have the date - I'll announce the location. Don't want to be hexing myself...

"Gardenia Blossoms" - my one true attempt at a love story is due to appear in the Spring 2012 edition of Deep South Magazine. No idea the actual date, but once I know something - you will too.

Other Friends for Sale

Earth Angel: A Novella
So now you know - it isn't just the short stories I love, I also do novellas from time to time. I picked this one from the four I have ready-to-go. I'm not sure why other than I really love the little girl in this. The seed/idea that started this whole 60 page, chaotic maelstrom was that I imagined being in such a vile, repulsive, horrifying situation - but being so damaged that ... it wasn't horrible at all.
As most know, I love finding beauty in trash and this was just another attempt to make something incredibly unpleasant - pleasant.

The Two O'Clock
This is one of my personal favorites - for a variety of reasons. First, it's set in a location that's seared into my memory. Secondly, it's a line by line retelling of a teensy piece of Dante's Inferno. Third - it's a pretty decent story.

Pale Yellow
This is probably the oldest thing available at the present time. I first wrote PY about 6 years ago, in a much different version. I did some braiding and twisting, teased and combed and ended up with this version available now. I cannot explain why so many people have downloaded this one, I did not see that coming. It's a pleasant surprise to learn that my sick fans also enjoy long, drawn-out scenes of torture, angst and discomfort centered around little old ladies. Shame on all of us for liking this!

Lucky Bedelia
This is the next oldest friend for sale - Bedelia is about 4 years old and has been highly fluffed as well. I had no expectations when I first wrote this. It wasn't meant for sharing but one of many stories I write just to "get the stink out."
My intention here was to take an ordinary young woman - common in every way, and tear her apart limb-by-limb through a series of ridiculous accidents. I think I nailed it. The only thing I did leave out of the version available here is that the original had a slightly altered ending whereby I set the building on fire and let Bedelia burn - but on the last reading, by the time I got to the glass-busting finale, I felt like she'd suffered enough. Bedelia is the opposite of lucky.

What's Coming?

A new novella - something freshtacular...it will be out by the end of February 2012 and should be cherished by one and all. I have tried painfully to get a little bit of everything into this surreal, sci-fi/fantasy adventure...and if it wasn't so damn funny, I could probably edit it a lot faster.
I've been very vague with my hints but the gist is that it's a story about love. The protagonist is unlike anything that's been penned before - and the setting ("Mattropolis") should send most people shivering into their showers. Again - I am hoping to make the cringe-worthy...spectacular.

Speaking of edits...lemme get on that now...

xoww